The break-up letter we all need to write.
Ending our toxic relationship with being busy.
Dear Busy,
It’s not you it’s me.
I thought going on our break during lockdown would send me rushing back to you. I was certain I would be desperate to see you again from the moment I woke up. That my days just wouldn’t feel complete without you in them. That I would need to feel your pressure upon my body, my heart skipping beats before bed.
But Busy.
I just don’t.
Now that I’ve had time to pause and step away from our intensity, I’ve discovered my sense of self was dependent upon you.
To feel successful, popular & important I was just using you to make me look good.
You know how attractive you are Busy.
Intoxicatingly so.
But, I’ve realised that you only ever want me when I’m running, rushing, richocheting off of your numerous levers, like a frenzied silver pinball.
Whenever I’ve tried to step away from us before you’ve made me feel guilty for being myself.
You know the games you played.
Telling me I was ‘nothing’ without you, filling my head with threats of ‘missing out’ and ‘being left behind’. The slower, nurtured, more considered version of me never interested you did it? But now I see why.
You’re scared.
You know you can’t control me if I don’t need to rely on you for validation.
The spell has broken and no longer enslaved to your pace of life, I feel enchanted by the gift of time; something you never really had much of to give me.
So there isn’t much left to say except, I’ll post burnout & exhaustion to you, I know how fond you are of them.
Jade
Ps. Don’t try to reach me – I’ve changed the password for my calendar.
Jade aka ‘The Someday Coach’ is a Life Coach based in the UK.
You can find her on Instagram @thesomedaycoach
